~ Harriet Lerner
An intimate relationship is one in which we can be who we are (rather than what the other person wants and expects us to be) and allow the other person to do the same. This means we can say what we think and feel in a relatively uncensored way, and we can share both our competence and our vulnerability without having to hide or exaggerate either. Authenticity and truth-telling — and the sense of safety, ease, and comfort in a relationship that make these possible — are at the heart of intimacy. An intimate relationship enlarges — rather than diminishes — our sense of the world and ourselves.